So, here’s the deal … Gustav is “projected” to make landfall around Morgan City, Louisiana which means it will be east of us. (We are basically 40 miles northwest of Galveston on the map … still within the “cone” of the storm.) Of course, there is always the chance that things could change. But if he makes landfall where they’re projecting, that’s good for us because it puts us on what is called the “clean side” of the storm. Even if Gustav stays a Category 4 storm by landfall, we will not evacuate. Morgan City is about 250 miles away. We should get a lot of rain and some strong winds. BUT if Gustav should make a last minute turn to the west and come in either at Galveston or (heaven forbid) Freeport, and if he is still a Cat 4, we will pack up the family and go further inland. If he is a Cat 3 or less, even coming in west of us, and being on the “dirty side,” we would not evacuate.

Now all we can do is wait and see where he decides to make landfall.

Still no word from the other guy’s insurance company on a settlement for my Mustang. They deemed it totaled and therefore were not obligated to continue to pay for me to have a rental car … so I had to turn the car back in early last week. But here’s the unfair part. It seems that there should be a REASONABLE length of time between accepting responsibility for my car and getting me a check so I can go ahead and buy something else. But apparently not as far as they’re concerned!

So now we are turning to OUR insurance company to go ahead and settle it so we can at least have some $$$ to car shop with and they will, of course, subrogate against the other guy’s insurance company to reimburse them. We are hoping to have a check by the end of this week so we can possibly buy a car this weekend. I’m so tired of driving the 17-year old, gas-guzzling Suburban around. It’s like trying to maneuver a yacht on land!

I know this has been around a long time … but it’s still funny so I thought I’d post it. We all need a good laugh. Enjoy!

The sermon this morning: ‘Jesus Walks on the Water.’ The sermon tonight:’Searching for Jesus.’
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Our youth basketball team is back in action Wednesday at 8 PM in the recreation hall. Come out and watch us kill Christ the King.
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Ladies, don’t forget the rummage sale. It’s a chance to get rid of those things not worth keeping around the house. Bring your husbands.
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The peacemaking meeting scheduled for today has been canceled due to a conflict.
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Remember in prayer the many who are sick of our community. Smile at someone who is hard to love. Say ‘Hell’ to someone who doesn’t care much about you.
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Don’t let worry kill you off — let the Church help.
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Miss Charlene Mason sang ‘I will not pass this way again,’ giving obvious pleasure to the congregation.
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For those of you who have children and don’t know it, we have a nursery downstairs.
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Next Thursday there will be tryouts for the choir. They need all the help they can get.
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The Rector will preach his farewell message after which the choir will sing:’Break Forth Into Joy.’
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Irving Benson and Jessie Carter were married on October 24 in the church. So ends a friendship that began in their school days.
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A bean supper will be held on Tuesday evening in the church hall. Music will follow.
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At the evening service tonight, the sermon topic will be ‘What Is Hell?’ Come early and listen to our choir practice.
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Eight new choir robes are currently needed due to the addition of several new members and to the deterioration of some older ones.
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Scouts are saving aluminum cans, bottles and other items to be recycled. Proceeds will be used to cripple children.
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Please place your donation in the envelope along with the deceased person you want remembered.
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The church will host an evening of fine dining, super entertainment and gracious hostility.
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Potluck supper Sunday at 5:00 PM - prayer and medication to follow.
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The ladies of the Church have cast off clothing of every kind. They may be seen in the basement on Friday afternoon.
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This evening at 7 PM there will be a hymn singing in the park across from the Church. Bring a blanket and come prepared to sin.
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Ladies Bible Study will be held Thursday morning at 10 AM. All ladies are invited to lunch in the Fellowship Hall after the B. S. is done.
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The pastor would appreciate it if the ladies of the congregation would lend him their electric girdles for the pancake breakfast next Sunday.
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Low Self Esteem Support Group will meet Thursday at 7 PM. Please use the back door.
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Weight Watchers will meet at 7 PM at the First Presbyterian Church. Please use large double door at the side entrance.
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The eighth-graders will be presenting Shakespeare’s Hamlet in the Church basement Friday at 7 PM. The congregation is invited to attend this tragedy.

A man riding his Harley was riding along a California beach when suddenly the sky clouded above his head and, in a booming voice, the Lord said, ‘Because you have tried to be faithful to me in all ways, I will grant you one wish.’

The biker pulled over and said, ‘Build a bridge to Hawaii so I can ride over anytime I want.’

The Lord said, ‘Your request is materialistic, think of the enormous challenges for that kind of undertaking; the supports required reaching the bottom of the Pacific and the concrete and steel it would take! It will nearly exhaust several natural resources. I can do it, but it is hard for me to justify your desire for worldly things. Take a little more time and think of something that could possibly help mankind.’

The biker thought about it for a long time.

Finally, he said, ‘Lord, I wish that I and all men could understand women; I want to know how she feels inside, what she’s thinking when she gives me the silent treatment, why she cries, what she means when she says nothing’s wrong, and how I can make a woman truly happy.’

The Lord replied, ‘You want two lanes or four on that bridge?’

Copy and paste this into your url. It’s cute … no foul langugage … just a funny commediene.

http://www.stupidshiz.com/index.cfm?mode=media&media_id=D6775EC1-1372-527D-081BA608E8E858D4

Okay, yesterday I had to get really nasty with the adjuster at the other guy’s insurance company. Here it is, a week later, and I still did not have a rent car. They have the police report which plainly shows their policyholder was at fault. So what’s the hold up? Well … here’s how our conversation went:

“I’m wondering when I’m going to get a rent car. It’s been a week now and I have no transportation to get to and from work.”

“Well, ma’am, we still have to get a statement from our client as to what happened.”

“Why do you need a statement? You have the police report. That says everything you need to know.”

“Well, I don’t see the report here.”

“Then give me your fax number and I’ll fax it to you immediately.”

“Wait a minute … let me check.” (I get put on hold for about 10 minutes. She returns …) “Okay, I found it.”

“Good. So when can I pick up a car?”

“Well, I still need to contact the client and get his statement.”

“Oh, so what you’re saying is that you’d take your client’s word on what happened over what’s in the police report?”

“Uh, no … it’s just our policy. You know, you can go ahead and rent a car and then we’ll reimburse you when we have gathered all the information.”

“Well let me put it to you like this. Why should I have to rent a car and put it on MY credit card when YOUR client is the reason I don’t have a car in the first place? If your client had obeyed the law, we wouldn’t even be having this conversation. So I’m asking you again … when can I pick up my car?”

“Um ….”

“Okay, listen close because I’m only going to say this once … Don’t force me to call in other people to speak on my behalf because I can have someone call you this afternoon. Now here’s what I want from your company. I want you to call your client as soon as we complete this conversation. Get his statement. Then call me back by the end of today and tell me that I can go pick up a rent car. I know that all you have to do is contact your superior and have him or her make the decision to give me a car. You have the police report and that’s all your company needs to make that decision. I’m not asking you to give me a check to buy a new car today. I only want a rental car. Oh, and by the way … I hope you’re recording this conversation because I want your boss to know exactly how upset I am. So, I’ll be expecting your call soon.”

And I hung up.

At 5:45 pm I got a call … picked up my rental car at 5:55 pm …

I guess it’s true that the squeaky wheel DOES get the grease …