Today is International Disadvantaged People’s Day.

Please send an encouraging message to a disturbed friend… just as I’ve done.

After directory assistance gave me my boyfriend’s new telephone number, I dialed him — and got a woman.

“Is Mike there?” I asked confused.

“Umm, he’s in the shower,” she responded.

“Please tell him his girlfriend called,” I said and hung up.

When he didn’t return the call, I dialed again. This time a man answered. “This is Mike,” he said.

“You’re not my boyfriend!” I exclaimed.

“I know,” he replied. “That’s what I’ve been trying to tell my wife for the past half-hour.”

I haven’t felt well today. It started yesterday when I got home from work. I had a little nausea and a headache. I took some medicine and went to bed early. When I woke up this morning I felt somewhat better so I went on to work. But by 9:30′ish I was feeling bad again so I came home. I took some more medicine and slept until about 3:30, then got up and piddled around the house a little, laid back down, and slept until 6:00, at which time I got up and started preparing dinner. Now here it is, a little bit after 8:00, and I’m ready to hit the sack again. I’m hoping this is just some sort of “bug” that will soon be gone. I’m ready to have my life back!

Here are some pictures I took this weekend while in the hill country of Texas (near Austin, the state capitol). I was with my church for some leadership training. We stayed at a place called Canyon of the Eagles Lodge and Nature Park. It was a fun weekend … my group even won the scavenger hunt! We probably hiked about 5 miles, finding clues all along the way. Tiresome, but fun. I shared a lodge with one of my friends. We had a nice view out our back porch. Anyway, hope you enjoy my pictures.

After a day of grueling maneuvers under the blazing Texas sun, the platoon stood in front of the barracks.

“All right, ladies, think about this,” bellowed the drill instructor. “If you could have ten minutes alone, right now, with anyone in the world, who would it be?”

Amid much mumbling, one voice was heard from the back row.

“My recruiter.”

I’m told there is a huge rock near a gravel pit on Hwy. 25 in Iowa. For generations, kids have painted slogans, names, and obscenities on this rock, changing its character many times. A few months back, the rock received its latest paint job, and since then it has been left completely undisturbed. It’s quite an impressive sight. Be sure to scroll down and check out the multiple photos (all angles) of the rock. I thought the flag was draped over the rock but it’s not … it’s actually painted on the rock, too!

Here’s a picture of the artist …

AWESOME Work, RAY…Thank you!

“God Bless America” and “Our Soldiers and Vets”

It’s interesting to me how the human mind works (or doesn’t) as we age. But not only the mind. Everything goes to pot! The ears fail to hear clearly, the eyes don’t see as well as they once did, and certainly the body itself fails to respond.

I visited my mother in the nursing home yesterday and saw the other patients that reside there as well. There was Hosie, with her big, gap-toothed smile and her “Da Da” answer for everything. There was the man who keeps his “stash” of things in the back of his wheelchair, even trash. There was Mrs. Elsie, who not too long ago could play a mean game of dominoes, but now only sits around mumbling nonsense at the top of her lungs. And there was Victor …

When my mother was first admitted to the nursing home, Victor misunderstood her last name (WELLS) and thought it was WELCH … in his mind, she became Raquel Welch. He’s been trying ever since to convince his family and friends that he’s in the same nursing home with Raquel Welch. Of course, they don’t believe him … but that doesn’t stop him from telling them.

And yesterday was no different. My mother had just had a shower, her hair had been washed, and they had put clean clothes on her when we arrived. I rolled her wheelchair into the “living room” and we all sat down to visit with her. Victor was nearby and naturally, he had to tell me how much he had always enjoyed Raquel’s movies!

Amazingly, she was pretty alert. Of course, it was only 10:15 in the morning, too. But while she didn’t talk alot (she never really does) she enjoyed sitting with us and listening to us talk and ask her questions that she couldn’t seem to recall the answers to. She noticed that Erica had on a flashy pair of tennis shoes … “Are those new shoes?” she asked. “Yes, Granny, they are.” Then about 10 minutes later … “Are those new shoes?” Ha! I guess if only one good thing could be said about alzheimer’s patients, it’s that they meet new people and experience new things everyday!

(“Raquel”)

(Victor)

Those of you who aren’t familiar with the Houston, Texas area probably won’t understand most of this joke … but trust me … it’s really funny.)

ANNOUNCEMENT: Mattel recently announced the release of limited-edition Barbie Dolls for the Houston area market.

River Oaks Barbie - This princess Barbie is sold only at The Galleria. She comes with an assortment of Kate Spade, Prada, and LV Handbags, Rolex watch, a Lexus SUV, a long-haired foreign dog named Honey, and a 25,000 sq. ft. patio home. Available with or without tummy tuck and face lift. Workaholic Ken sold only in conjunction with the augmented version.

Spring, Texas Barbie - The modern day homemaker Barbie is available with a Ford Windstar Minivan and matching gym outfit. She gets lost easily and has no full-time occupation. Traffic jamming cell phone sold separately.

Aldine Barbie - This recently paroled Barbie comes with a 9mm handgun, a Ray Lewis knife, a Chevy with dark tinted windows, and a Meth Lab Kit. This model is only available after dark and must be paid for in cash (preferably small, untraceable bills). Unless you are a cop in which case we don’t know what you’re talking about.

Tanglewood Barbie - This yuppie Barbie comes with your choice of Rolls Royce convertible or Hummer H2. Included are her own Starbucks cup, credit card, and country club membership. Also availble for this set are Shallow Ken and Private School Skipper. You won’t be able to afford any of them.

Ft. Bend Barbie - This pale model comes dressed in her own Wrangler jeans two sizes too small, a NASCAR t-shirt and tweety bird tattoo on her shoulder. She has a six-pack of Bud light and a Hank Williams, Jr. CD set. She can spit over 5 feet and kick mullet-haired Ken’s butt when she is drunk. Purchase her pickup truck separately and get a confederate flag bumper sticker absolutely free.

Memorial Barbie - This collagen injected, rhino plastic Brbie wears a leopard print outfit and drinks cosmopolitans while entertaining friends. Percocet prescription available as well as warehouse conversion condo.

Huntsville Barbie - This tobacco-chewing, brassy-haired Barbie has a pair of her own high-heeled sandals with one broken heel from the time she chased beer-gutted Ken out of Butler Barbie’s house. Her ensemble includes low-rise, acid-washed jeans, fake fingernails, and a see-through halter top. Also available with a mobile home.

Mid-Town Barbie - This doll is made of actual tofu. She has long, straight, brown hair, arch-less feet, hairy armpits, no makeup, and Birkenstocks with white socks. She prefers that you call her Willow. She does not want or need a Ken doll but if you purchase two Mid-Town Barbies and the optional Subaru wagon, you get a rainbow flag bumper sticker for free.

East Houston Barbie - This Barbie now comes with a stroller and infant doll. Optional accessories include a GED and bus pass. Gangsta Ken and his 1979 Caddy were available, but are now very difficult to find since the addition of the infant.

Montrose Barbie/Ken - This versatile doll can be easily converted from Barbie to Ken by simply adding or subtracting the multiple snap-on parts.